Take a breath now – things are not as gloomy as they may appear. Some lighter energies prevailing in December may be just what you need at year-end.
Most likely, you indeed are coping better than you realize. After all, you have been conditioned to be hard on yourself and to see yourself as less than others. This conditioning skews your view, setting in motion waves of self-doubt and feelings of unworthiness. It can cause you to think that you are the only one having a bad day, and that you should be sailing smoothly over the choppy seas.
From a big picture perspective, you do have some good days and even the troublesome ones provide spiritual fuel for your forward momentum.